Author: worldsupremechamp

Week 3 Recap

THE 11TH

Undefeated in fantasy football. Check. Nebraska Corn Huskers undefeated at 4-0. Check. Man, Andrew is going to be walking around his wedding on Saturday like:

turk.gif

This is easily the best start out of either Nebraska/Colorado team. I forgot that the Post/Meulemans moved to Colorado.

 

Ballerado if you dig 3Oh!3

 

Anyways, the 11th has made a living in 2016 beating up on the lesser teams of World Supreme Championship Fantasy Football. Taking out fiancée in week 1, and destroying Power Bottoms in week 3. I will give props for being able to trump TakeItToTheLimit in week 2, but other than that, I’m not convinced that this is a team made for the long haul. I guess we will see.

 

WOODVILLE PECKERS

The Peckers of Woodville were off to a terrific start. The 2016 season appeared to be year 2 of Schmidt Schmidt’s back to baaaack title run. Then Marvin Jones happened. Schmidt would be wise to write a strongly worded letter to Dom Capers regarding his use of the prevent defense for an entire half. Speaking of Dom Capers, what the fuckin’ fuck is that on top of Dom’s head?

WHAT?!

capers-1

HUH!?

capers-2

 

WHY!?

capers-3

Things don’t get any easier for the defending champ as he takes on the 1st place squad of the 11th.

 

THANKYOULORDBREESUS

Its matchups like Nikolay’s(can we still call her that?) week 3 matchup that made league officials consider some kind of mercy rule. Embarassing Puddlemere United by nearly 100 points is as impressive a victory as we have seen in the short history of this league. Part of it is Puddlemere United putting up such a low score with 70. However, being able to put up 168 points in a standard format league? Sure, in a PPR league 150+ is pretty common, but to drop 168 in a standard league is incredible.

 

Good for you, Glenn Coco!!

 

GREEN’N’YELLO

Perhaps the upset of the week, Green’N’Yello trounced the defending champs 157 to 107. A 50 point beat down on the backs of Marvin Jones, and Terelle Pryor. Combining for more than 50 points alone, that’s too much trouncing!! The reemergence of Aaron Rodgers, and the continued early season success of THE Carlos Hyde has been icing on the cake.

Maybe one of the better draft pick was Cathy getting DeVante Parker in the 7th round. He hasn’t reach stud status just yet, but he is well on his way. Let’s hope Ryan Tannehill can eventually figure how to stop playing like poop.

 

Week 4 will be a struggle for Cathy as she is tasked with having to replace Aaron Rodgers on his very early, no good bye week. Is Jamis Winston the answer?

 

TAKINGITTOTHELIMIT

Mike was in danger of starting the 2016 season at 1-2. One of the worst starts to the season in franchise history. I’m going to give the Lincoln Llamas the benefit of the doubt and assume had Becky not been preoccupied with last minute wedding details, she probably starts Tevin Coleman and(maybe) Kirk Cousins. Those two would have been enough to get the W.

Either way, good teams find a way to win, and that’s exactly what Mike did. After Tom Brady’s suspension is over, the rest of the league might be in a little bit of trouble. TakingItToTheLimits obsession with keeping Charles Sims on his team has finally paid off and Sims is making hay while the Doug Martin is shining injured. Maybe because his dad is a Tampa Bay fan? Mike Evans, Charles Sims, why don’t you have Winston, dude? I’m sure Cathy would cut him loose for Jordy Nelson.

Sounds like a fair trade to me.

 

TakingItToTheLimit squares up with LowerEastLeviathans in week 4. Your is currently a 6 point dog, dawg.

 

LOWEREASTLEVIATHANS

Underwhelming performances from Antonio Brown, CJ Anderson,  Jeremy Maclin, and Eli Manning weren’t enough to keep Jordan down in week 3. TY Hilton clinched this victory with a late game 80+ yard touchdown which was the difference. It is strange to see Eli Manning on Jordan’s roster, because during my time as Jordan’s roommate, not many things made him as happy as he was when making fun of Eli Manning.  I’ll give you a nice deal on a gently used Carson Wentz if it helps you out, dude.

Jordan’s 2-1 record is good enough for 6th place, 3 in the Eastern divison. Speaking of divisions, I realize that they are a little out of whack this year. Rookie Mistake should be in the west as Sam resides in the Minnesota-ish region.

I’d like to go ahead and reiterate the fact that Jordan’s team name is the best in the league. Supernatural season 11 is scheduled to be streaming on Netflix starting October 8th. Can’t wait.

Jordan faces the overachieving TakingItToTheLimit in week 4.

 

FAVRE DOLLA FOOTLONG

The luckiest dude in fantasy football. Week 1, wins by .5 points despite scoring only 85 points. Week 3, Favre Dolla Footlong wins by nine points despite scoring only 75 points. Good grief!! Why can’t I luck into this kind of schedule? Vosters could sit his QB and his defense and still manage to eek out a victory. I don’t get it. Must be from playing in the soft Western Division…amirite?!

If Favre Dolla Footlong gets into the playoffs, and the Dundas Blues don’t this league is going to shutter it’s doors for good. Lock it up.

Favre Dolla Footlong continues their cupcake schedule in week 4 against the lowly, uninspiring PowerBottoms

 

DUNDAS BLUES

EVP has scored the 7th most points in the league and sits in the 8th seed, so it’s not like he is the victim of some scheduling injustice. Had he followed his rule of avoiding Thursday night games whenever possible, he would be looking at a 2-1 record thanks to Kyle Rudolph. Instead the Dundas Blues panicked at the last second and shoved Martellus Bennett in the lineup.

Not that Jordan wasn’t worthy of the victory, but EVP needs to get out of his own way. This has been his downfall since this league started. LEARN TO MANAGE YOUR TALENT, STUPID!!!

I think we can all agree that choosing to hang on to Jeremy Langford instead of Matt Forte has been the 2nd worth mistake of the year. 1st being the release of Stefon Diggs and Kyle Rudolph when Teddy Two-gloves got injured. Looking at you, Brad.

 

LINCOLN LLAMAS

I honestly thought Becky was going to upset Mike this week. Projections were in her favor for most of Sunday afternoon, but the Lincoln Llamas just weren’t able to hang on. Still though, the Lincoln Llamas just seem to be a different team this season. Becky isn’t looked at as an easy victory, or a tune up game anymore. Even if the Lincoln Llamas don’t make a deep post season run, it appears as though things are looking up for the fans of Lincoln.

Speaking of which, maybe Becky needs to change the team name since her and Andrew no longer live in Nebraska anymore? Just sayin’

The Lincoln Llamas go into week 4 looking to make an example of the vulnerable Green’N’Yello

 

POWER BOTTOMS

Bro, how are you only going to score 69 points? When I announced that Brrrrrrad Maurice was taking over for the garbage team that Josh kept trotting out, I felt as though we had a nice competitive balance to the league now. Brad’s season thus far has been a let down to this point. Yes, it is only week 3, but I can’t say that I have seen anything to convince me that Power Bottoms are a threat in 2016.

There is still plenty of season to turn this thing around. Starting Daren Sproles would be a good start.

You guys remember when Teddy Bridgewater injured his knee and Brad dropped both Kyle Rudolph and Stefon Diggs within an hour? Well those two have combines for 60ish points. That would have gone a long way for Power Bottoms.

 

ROOKIE MISTAKE/PUDDLEMERE UNITED

I hate to lump you guys into the same recap but I ran out of time this week. Your season thus far is pretty much the same.

You guys play each other this week so one of you will get your first victory and the other will start 0-4. 0-4 is not a death sentence, but it will be an uphill battle the rest of the season. The Dundas Blues started their 2014 season 1-5 and managed to make the post season.

I have faith,

 

WEEK 2 RECAP

Hey guys, sorry for the lack of recap last week. I was having internet issues. Everything is in working order now, you can expect a weekly recap every Wednesday/Thursday-ish

WOODVILLE PECKERS

The reigning champion has shot out of the cannon of 2016 to a 2-0 start, having rolled over LowerEastLeviathans and last year’s runner up Rookie Mistake. Even without keeping last year’s fantasy darling, David Johnson, Schmidt Schmidt is still blowing teams out by 20 on a weekly basis.

“Mamma, there goes that man!”

Week 3 brings in familiar foe Green’N’Yello, led by a struggling Aaron Rodgers who can’t seem to get his shit together.

 

THE 11TH

Andrew’s fall of 2016 couldn’t get much better. His beloved Nebraska Corn Huskers are currently ranked 20th in the country after taking care of Oregon last weekend. He’s a few weeks away from marrying the love of his life, and for his fantasy team is undefeated at 2-0.  Does it get any better?

You can make the argument that 2 wins is a fluke, but I wouldn’t say that regarding the 11th’s early season success. Factor in that this success has come without the services of 1st round pick, Rob Gronkowski, and stud running back, Jamaal Charles.

Andrew will look to continue to build on his quick start against league newcomer, Power Bottoms.

 

DAMNYOUDREWBREES

Abby has a really solid start to the 2016 season after mercilessly beating PowerBottoms by nearly 30 points. The biggest steal in league history, David Johnson, was his usual self, scoring 19 points, and Drew Brees did his best Lord and Savior impression, erupting for 31 points against Oakland. My goodness.

Week 2 was a different story as Abby squared up against the Lincoln Llamas. What should have been an easy win turned into stomach churning disappointment.

Both David Johnson and Drew Brees turned in mortal performances and dispite Eric Decker’s(Minnesota’s finest) best efforts, DamnYouDrewBrees didn’t have enough to overcome the new look Llamas of Lincoln.

Maybe next week, Abby

 

TAKEITTOTHELIMIT

Raise your hand if you had The 11th taking down Mike this week. Yeah, me neither. Week two was a black eye on the face of perennial contender, TakeItToTheLimit. Woof. Thanks for nothing, Danny Woodhead, Jordan Reed, and Golden Tate. I was under the impression that with Calvin Johnson out of the picture, this was going to be the Golden Tate show. Matthew Stafford certainly throws the ball enough. The Lions WRs are basically a collection of castoffs from the rest of the league. I kinda like it? How can you not be a fan of Anquon Boldin?

Anyways, if Mike drops to 1-2 at the hands of the Lincoln Llamas he’ll probably never hear the end of it.

 

LINCOLN LLAMAS

The Lincoln Llamas have spent the last half decade doing their best Cleveland Browns impression. Just really really not very good at all. However, the winds might be changing in Lincoln. After an impression victory over DamnYouDrewBrees, Becky is poised to shed her reputation as league bottom feeder and rise like a phoenix into the fantasy football post season.

Are the Lincoln Llamas for real or was weak 2 a fluke?

 

LOWEREASTLEVIATHANS

Jordan got off to a great start in 2016, amassing 123 points. Unfortunately those points weren’t enough to keep up with Schmidt Schmidt and the Woodville Peckers who trounced Jordan for 144 points.

Week 2 was a poor showing for the LowerEastLeviathans as Jordan was only able to muster up 83 points. Fortunately, those 83 points were scored against Favre Dolla Footlong and were enough to secure the victory. Classic Vosters.

Week 3 should be an interesting matchup for the LowerEastLeviathans as they face off against the sporatic Dundas Blues. Good luck, dude.

 

DUNDAS BLUES

The ever sporadic, slow starting Dundas Blues were at it again in week 2. Coming off an embarrassing loss to Favre Dolla Footlong in week 1, EVP came back with a 38 point victory over Green’N’Yello. Sorry, Cath. Fielding, on paper, one of the league’s strongest teams, it appears the Dundas Blues will struggle with consistency for the 800th year in a row. Like clockwork.

Fantasy studs like Odell Beckham, Dez Bryant, and Todd Gurley continue to dodge the endzone like:

george-w

While 11th year dinosaur Larry Fitzgerald continues to shoulder the load. If EVP’s team can ever hit on all cylinders, the league championship is a realistic possibility. Only time will tell.

 

GREEN’N’YELLO

Similar to the last few years, Cathy has hitched her wagon to Aaron Rodger’s star. As has been the case with the 2016 Packers, Green’N’Yello has struggled to find their flow. Injuries have taken their toll already in this young season as Doug Martin will be out for an extended period of time, and Devonte Parker has been nagged by a hamstring injury since the beginning of training camp.

(Speaking of hamstring injuries, Bucks star guard Khris Middleton will be out for 6 god damn months after tearing his hamstring. Training camp doesn’t open for another 2 weeks. UUUUGHH!!)

Green’N’Yello faces off against league juggernaut Woodville Peckers in week 3. Good luck, Kitty Kitty Kitty Cath

 

POWER BOTTOMS

Following a snap, panic induced decision to cut ties with all things Minnesota Vikings, Brad took a beating in week 1. The production of waived WR Stefon Diggs was sorely missing. Week 2 was a different story as Power Bottoms was able to secure a victory on the back of Matt Forte who owned the Buffalo Bills for 28.90 points. Greg Olsen was the icing on the cake with 18.20 points in a win over Puddlemere United.

Man, can you imagine if this team still had Diggs, Amari Cooper, and Kyle Rudolph?? Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude

Brad faces off against undefeated The 11th in week 3.

 

FAVRE DOLLA FOOTLONG

The league’s favorite team Favre Dolla Footlong is off to a very Voster’s start, ranking 10th in the league. Yeah, you can make the argument that its only week 2, and 10 of the 12 teams all have the same record, but still. Favre Dolla Footlong got by EVP in week thanks to an ill advised screen pass to Tod Gurley that resulted in a loss of 5 yards. Favre Dolla Footlong went on to win by .5. All because Case Keenum can’t throw down the field and is reliant on passes to the outside. Why the fuck are they using a power back in the passing game anyway?

Vosters went on to score a whole 74 points in week 2 against LowerEastLeviathans to drop to 1-1. I’m not even bothering to do the math, but I’m 80% sure Favre Dolla Footlong has the lowest point average in the league. Fuckin Tod Fuckin Gurley. The #3 ranked player in 2016 fantasy football cant get more than 50 yards? He’s on the block if anybody is interested.

Vosters will face RookieMistake in week 3

 

ROOKIEMISTAKE

Sam enjoyed a successful campaign in 2015, reaching the post season and ultimately losing the championship game. 2016 has been a stuggle thus far as RookieMistake has limped out to an 0-2 start.

Rookie Mistake has the roster to be a contender in this league, led by old ass Carson Palmer, and prolific WR AJ Green. If Sam can manage to win a couple of games and have Le’Veon Bell back for week 5, she will be in great shape for the rest of the season. However, if she were to start out 0-4, that’s quite a big hole to dig out of.

Rookie Mistake faces Vosters and Favre Dolla Footlong in week 3. Should be an easy W

PUDDLEMERE UNITED

I can’t believe Robyn is the worst ranked team in the league. Yes, it’s only week 2, but still. Maybe I am over rating Puddlemere United, but I always felt like they were one of the more competitive teams in the league, no?

Puddlemere United faces the headache of trying to replace Adrian Peterson. Peterson was having a slow start to the year, but he is one of a few guys you don’t have to think about starting in this league. What a perfect time to slide Ameer Abdulah into the starting lineup annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd then he goes on IR. FOZZY WHITTAKER?!

Robyn looks to get that first victory in week 3 vs DamnYouDrewBrees

2016 WORLD SUPREME CHAMPIONSHIP FANTASY FOOTBALL PREVIEW

 

PUDDLEMERE UNITED

Robyn comes in to her fifth season having only made the playoffs once (2014). Coming off of a 2015 campaign in which Puddlemere United came in garbage-ass tenth, obviously there is room for improvement. Robyn’s draft day roster suggests a much stronger showing in 2016 as Puddlemere Graded out at the top of the league.

The Western division is always going to be tough with perennial powerhouse TakeIt2TheLimit, and new addition, PowerBottons. Maybe we even get a strong showing from the Nebraska teams The 11th and Lincoln Llamas…..probably not though.

 

FAVRE DOLLA FOOTLONG

7th, 9th, 2nd, 9th. Three of the last four years have been a shit show for Vosters, and we wouldn’t have it any other way. Favre Dolla Footlong had their best year in 2014, riding DeMarco Murray and Jordy Nelson all the way to a 2nd place finish. However, since Demarco Murray departed Dallas, Voster’s hasn’t been able to achieve any sort of success….even if his wife sets his lineup for him.

 

POWER BOTTOMS

Brrrrrrrrrrrrad takes over the dumpster that was Full Blown Fades/Beats By Ray/Josh. The same team that gift wrapped a 1st round pick late in the season for an ill-fated playoff push. Without a first round pick, things didn’t go very well in 2015. In fact, the only team to finish below Full Blown Fades were the lowly, lowly, Lincoln Llamas.

However, with new ownership in town, the fans of Power Bottoms have reason to be optimistic. Perhaps Brad has the answers to turn this thing around. Or maybe the fans will get another heaping helping of mediocrity. A devastating injury to Teddy Two-gloves wasn’t a good start to 2016.

 

LINCOLN LLAMAS

The Lincoln Llamas haven’t finished higher than 7th since their entry into the league in four years ago. Knowing this, Becky was a little hesitant to return for a 2016 campaign, but reluctantly, after some convincing, the Lincoln Llamas are back for a 5th year.

I’m not sure if this is by design, or lack of interest, but Becky opted to have Yahoo autopick her roster. Either way this is easily the best squad the Llamas of Lincoln have had to start the season. Might this signal a shift in power in the Western Division?

 

THE 11TH

The 11th and the Lincoln Llamas will always be linked together. Not just because the team owners share a house(and soon a last name) but because usually around week 7 or 8, The 11th will(attempt) to cherry pick all of the Lincoln Llamas best talent. Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuude. I don’t think that will be the case this year as Andrew, like Becky, enters 2016 with his strongest roster in team history.

When The 11th reached for Gronk so early in the 1st round I thought it was a mistake, but looking at the rest of the roster, that “reach” paid off for him.

LOWEREASTLEVIATHENS

Jordan, still possessing the best team name in our league, returns after an up and down freshman season that ended in the 7th spot, just outside of the playoffs. Inheriting a team that had 2 1st round picks, and keeping DeAndre Hopkins with a 9th round pick, the deck was heavily stacked in Jordan’s favor. However, a sub-par draft was truly too much to overcome.

Jordan avenged last season by churning out the league’s highest rated draft in the league. 2016 does not start out very easy as the LowerEastLeviathans face off against the defending champs in week 1.

 

GREEN’N’YELLO

Kitty Kitty Kitty Cath has had a tumultuous fantasy football career since winning the championship in 2013.  Following their ’13 title, Green’N’Yello finished 11th in 2014, but surged back to relevancy in 2015 with a 3rd place finish.

Repeatedly locking Aaron Rodgers in as a 1st round pick has handicapped Cathy’s squad in terms of having talent at RB or WR. This will be Aaron Rodgers 4th year in a row leading Green’N’Yello.

With the draft being on the eve of her first day of work, Cathy opted to use the Yahoo autopick. This resulted in Green’N’Yello’s worst draft grade in team history.

 

DAMNYOUDREWBREES

Much like Cathy, Abby has had Drew Brees on her team for what feels like an eternity. Every year Drew Brees. Drew Brees every year. Maybe it will actually pay off this year as Brees was just award a nice, savory contract extension. DamnYouDrewBrees was wise to pair their QB and newly acquired TE in Coby Fleener. Fleener should have been good in Indianapolis with his college teammate Andrew Luck, but he is having a hard time justifying his own payday right now.

Abby has been burdened with having to co-manage her husband’s team for the past couple of years. Any will conveniently have to go play for mass Sunday morning while Abby scrambles to field a respectable lineup for Favre Dolla Footlong.

Abby, you the real MVP.

 

TAKEIT2THELIMIT

I cant say I’m a fan of Mike’s new team name. I get the reference, but when I say “take it to the limit” aloud, it reminds me of the opening credits for the 30 for 30 of Tim Richmond, the Nascar driver who died of AIDS. The Opening credits have this song playing in the background

This is the face I think of when I read your team name, dude. I’m just sayin…

tim-rich

Anyways, Mike has been a perennial contender since the league’s inception, and I don’t have any reason to believe he won’t be a factor in 2016

 

DUNDAS BLUES

EVP has enjoyed consistent success during the regular season, making it to the post season every year thus far. However, once the playoffs start, the Dundas Blues meet Mike Hietpas in the playoffs and are ruthlessly, unceremoniously eliminated. EVERY. FUCKING. YEAR.

Perhaps this is the year that EVP gets over the hump, but 2016 has gotten off to a rocky start. Minutes after the draft EVP’s phone blew up with league members eager to point out the Dundas Blue’s draft grade. Ugh.

Panicking to draft a QB, EVP settled on Dak Prescott after plans of grabbing Carson Palmer were foiled.

Man, does EVP have egg on his face. Almost as bad as the dude that thought Jhavid Best was going to take the league by storm….

schumann

…lol

 

ROOKIEMISTAKE

Sam entered the league in 2012 and took the league by storm. Cruising to the #1 overall seed, Rookie Mistake fell short in the playoffs. Sam followed that up by not participating in 2013, and a 7th place finish in 2014.

2015 saw Rookie Mistake return to prominence as Sam’s squad pulled off the upset of the year in knocking Mike out of the playoffs. This is almost as bad for Mike as getting thrown out at home plate by a 12 year old Brad Vosters.

Sam did her patented autopick on draft night which yielded her a respectable, if not overly exciting team.

WOODVILLE PECKERS

Finally we get to the defending league champ. Schmidt Schmidt took home the gold in just his third year I the league. Relying heavily on prolific WR Antonio Brown, and surprise fantasy football juggernauts, Devonta Freeman, and David Johnson. Schmidt brings back said Devonta Freeman and a head scratcher in Letavius Murray. Not that Murray isn’t any good but David Johnson was an option with a 13th round pick.

 

DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE

WHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?!

 

Congratulations to the Woodville Peckers on their 2015-16 WSC Fantasy Football Championship

THE

CHAMP IS HERE!!!

schmidt

WEEK 4 RECAP

 

Oooooooh, does it feel good to be back. You can all thank Andrew for requesting the return of the weekly recap. You know what doesn’t feel good? Watching Joel Stave try and run the Wisconsin offense. Just awful. Every time I watch a game, I text Vosters about how its Tanner McEvoy time.

Joel-Stave-hurt-300x300

You can win games with a white running quarterback. See Eric Crouch and Taylor Martinez. What’s that? They’re both Nebraska quarterbacks? Not relevant. Although it is weird that they both ran a 4.47 40 yard dash. I think the Badgers would be better off if McEvoy played WR and QB at the same time. He could throw the ball, run downfield and catch it, Curt Hennig style.

Is there anything better than a grown man with a bleached pony tail?

We will recap each team going by ranking. Starting with Schmidt Schmidt. “Momma, there goes that man!!”

WOODVILLE PECKERS

Going into the 2015 season, the Woodville Peckers record as a franchise was 10-16, having never reached the post season. That’s pretty bad considering Schmidt Schmidt has his fantasy team logo as the floor mats in his car.

schmidts floor mats

I guess it doesn’t really matter as long as the plates aren’t expired….right?

As we progressed through our draft in August it was hard not to take notice of the team that the Woodville Peckers were assembling. Being able to carry over Antonio Brown and Andrew Luck from last year, while also adding Eddie Lacy and a sneaky good pick in Latavius Murray has Schmidt primed to lock up the Eastern Division before week 10. The real surprise this season for Schmidt Schmidt has been Devonta Freeman. Freeman was a pile of shit last season with a SEASON TOTAL of 57.3 points. Sell high while you can, dude.

freeman

Yahoo has jumped on the Woodville Peckers bandwagon, projecting Schmidt Schmidt to finish with a 12-1 record. No pressure, dude.

THUGZ-R-US

I know the actual team name doesn’t have a Z in it, but if that’s that team name, why not do it all the way? Speaking of which, Thugs-R-Us doesn’t really have any sketchy players on it this year. I’d say Percy Harvin MAYBE, and he has since been traded so perhaps a name change is in order? Speaking of team names/logos, it’s week 5 and six teams still have to default logo that Yahoo! gave them. C’mon guys. If Thugs-R-Us has Tom Brady and doesn’t use this photo, he should have to trade him away to a team that will.

brady

When the season started, it appeared as though Mike would take over the league and never give it back. Watching the live projections of weeks one and two hit the 150 mark, I thought Thugs-R-Us was going to crack 200 at one point. In week 3, Thugs-R-Us fell to Favre Dolla Footlong after scoring a season low 107 points. In week 4, Mike managed to score even fewer points but luckily it was against the lowly, lowly, lowly Dundas Blues and Thugs-R-Us was able to climb to 3-1.

Thugs-R-Us welcomes the return of Brady and Gronkowski from the bye week as Mike heads into a week 5 matchup with the leagues 2nd highest scoring team. As of Wednesday afternoon, Thugs-R-Us is a 7 point dog.

LOWER EAST LEVIATHANS

If you’re a fan of Supernatural, Jordan probably has the best team name in our league. If you’re not a fan of Supernatural, you can go to hell. Jordan enters the league taking over the terrible, awful, no good team that Nicky G left for him in 2014. Representing the lower east side of Milwaukee’s downtown, specifically the Brady Street area, also known as hipster heaven. Sorry, dude.

I didn’t expect a lot out of this team in 2015, only because his choice of keeper players was pretty poor, which left Jordan at a disadvantage. Lower East Leviathans did have an extra 1st round pick at their disposal though which was not wasted in Jamaal Charles.

Jordan has been able to eclipse 100 points in every week except week 2, a loss to the undefeated Woodville Peckers. Week 5 will be another tough matchup for Jordan going up against the league’s highest scoring team, Thugs-R-Us. Currently the favorite, a win would most certainly put Jordan in the conversation for league’s best team.

GREEN’N’YELLO

Kitty Kitty Kitty Cath tanked her season last year to ensure herself a high enough draft spot to bring back Aaron Rodgers for another two years, assuming she keeps him next year, which we all know she will. A former league champion, I can’t argue with her strategy as my trophy case is still empty. The manager of Green’N’Yello is no stranger to hardware as Cathy was a two-time, two-time, two-time, defensive MVP of Kaukauna Girls Varsity Soccer. I knew a girl in High School who played JV as a senior. We all knew who it was, so I won’t mention her by name. Speaking of Kaukauna, did you guys know that Riverview has 5th graders now too? Why?

Anyways, in classic Green’N’Yello fashion, Cathy made sure to bring Aaron Rodgers favorite target Randall Cobb back and the short term returns have been tremendous. Specifically in week 3 when they combined for 63 points. Poor Josh. He showed up that week too. Josh!?

Green’N’Yello continued to roll in week 4 against Rookie Mistake, winning by 22 points. Granted, Sam was only able to score 70 points. With the win, Cathy is the Eastern Division’s 3rd ranked team, 4th overall. By the way, if the playoffs were today, the East would have 4 teams to the West’s 2 teams. Juuuust sayin’.

Green’N’Yello squares off against Favre Dolla Footlong in week 5.

THANKYOULORDBREESUS

Abby Nikolay Vosters started out the year strong as she rolled through Green’N’Yello and Full Blown Fades, but a Drew Brees injury had ThankYouLordBreesus’s season in jeopardy as elite QB’s, or even decent QB’s can be hard to come by. (See Full Blown Fades, Dundas Blues, The 11th) Abby dropped week 3, but was able to respond in week 4 with a victory over Favre Dolla Footlong.

I think even if I wasn’t doing recaps this year I would recap week 4 to point out that Andy only scored 53 points. Woof.

Abby’s roster doesn’t have a lot of star power, but the combination of Brees, Ingram, and Eiffert should be enough to keep ThankYouLordBreesus in games. If we had an award for GM of the year, Abby would win it for both Eastern and Western Divisions every year as Abby has a heavy influence with Favre Dolla Footlong.

ThankYouLordBreesus squares off against the 11th in week 5. As of Wednesday afternoon, Abby is a 38.75 underdog.

THE 11TH

This will be the 6th team recap, and only the 2nd team from the West. The Western Division ruled the podium last season so this shift is somewhat surprising. It is still only week 5 though so there’s a lot of time for teams in the West to get their poop together.

Andrew’s squad ranking in the top half is a refreshing change as the 11th(formerly Putzy Schmucks) hasn’t had a ton of success. A 5th place finish in 2013, and a 9th place finish in 2014 isn’t exactly something for fans of the franchise to get excited about. For what it’s worth, Andrew is off to his best start in franchise history, and with his strongest roster to date, perhaps this is the year the 11th makes a deep playoff run.

Andrew has arguably the best WR core in the league with Julian Edelman, Calvin Johnson, Amari Cooper, and James Jones, yet Le’Veon Bell is the only RB worth mentioning. Andrew is also planning to start Marcus Mariota at QB, so perhaps a trade is in the works. Just don’t make an offer for Cooper as you’d be wasting your time. Right, dude?

Andrew is projected to score 111 points in week 5 against ThankYouLordBreesus IF Karlos Williams plays, however his available is cloudy as he is going through to concussion protocol.

 

ROOKIE MISTAKE

This is Sam’s third season in our fantasy football league and she still isn’t sure how to add/drop players via the waiver wire. Yet she has accumulated a 2-2 record. Last year, Rookie Mistake was able to win seven games without putting together any real streak or momentum. So far in 2015, Rookie Mistake is having a similar year. Alternating wins and losses in each of the first four weeks.

Julio Jones was Sam’s lone keeper from the 2014 season, and he has made the difference. In games where Julio scores 20+, Rookie Mistake is 2-0. Now if that cock-ass Dovonta Freeman would stop scoring all of Atlanta’s touchdowns, Sam will be in good shape. Rookie Mistake goes into week 5 showdown against league best Peckers of Woodville.

 

FAVRE DOLLA FOOTLONG

Mr. Vosters comes into week 5 after scoring only 53 points in week 4. FIFTY-THREE points. Perhaps it was on purpose because he was playing his wife and didn’t feel like sleeping on the couch. Although having slept on said couch myself, it’s pretty comfortable.

Anyways, on paper, Favre Dolla Footlong is pretty talented squad. With AJ Green and Mike Evans at WR, and Jonathon Stewart and DeMarco Murray at RB, Vosters has the roster to contend in the West. You have to assume that Philadelphia will figure out it’s offense and allow Murray to return to stud form while Jamis Winston will find a way to get Mike Evans the ball more often. I like where this roster is at.

All that still doesn’t excuse the 53 points. Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude…

 

LINCOLN LLAMAS

Before the season started, I predicted that Becky and the Lincoln Llamas would end their post season drought. In return, Becky has the Lincoln Llamas off to a 1-3 start. Ugh. The Lincoln Llamas roster has the talent to compete. Matt Ryan, Emmanuel Sanders, and Marshawn Lynch alone should be enough to stay competitive. Even after donating Julian Edelman to The 11th. I am still sticking to my pick as the Lincoln Llamas being one of the 6 teams to make it to the post season. Perhaps once Marshawn Lynch is healthy, Becky will hit her stride.

The Lincoln Llamas face Full Blown Fades in week 5

 

PUDDLEMERE UNITED

I had to double and triple check that Puddlemere United was really the 10th ranked team in the league. How in the world? Brandon Marshall has been Mr. Consistent while Larry Fitz has turned back the clock, but then looking at how poorly Matt Stafford has been playing and the lack of quality RB talent it starts to make sense. I love me some Gio Bernard, but he’s a weekly flex at best.

Week 1 was a nightmare for Robyn as Mike unleashed the Patriots on Thursday and refused to call off the dogs on Sunday. Terrible. Luckily for Puddlemere United, they play against the league’s worst team in the Dundas Blues. After the Dundas Blues it’s a very manageable schedule of the Lincoln Llamas and Rookie Mistake. Very Doable.

FULL BLOWN FADES

Last year Josh allowed the autopick bot to draft his entire team. Before the season even started, Josh seemed to be selling off his quality players for scrubs. As the season went on it appeared he knew what he was doing all along. However, he stupidly mortgaged his 2015 season by dealing a 1st round pick for the services of AJ Green. We saw Josh attempt to improve the roster of Full Blown Fades this year in trades to acquired Melvin Gordon, Ameer Abdullah, and THE Carlos Hyde. Or Maybe he just wants a stable of Big 10 RBs. Either way things aren’t looking great for Josh. His talent at WR is sub-par and the RBs he coveted aren’t much better.

Full Blown Fades has time to turn this season around, but all signs point to this being a rebuild year for JoshBigWang

 

DUNDAS BLUES

EVP has had a thing for finding WR talent in the later rounds. (See Emmanuel Sanders, Kelvin Benjamin) This year it appeared as though Nelson Agholor, Brandon Coleman, and Phillip Dorsett were going to carry that torch in 2015. Unfortunately, none of the WR on the Dundas Blues roster have contributed much, if anything at all. Adams and Agholor really hurt too. How could they be this useless. Ugh

This complete lack of WR talent provoked EVP to make a trade of Odell Beckham Jr, but it came at the price of Adrian Peterson. Not a bad trade considering the Dundas Blues depth at RB.

As is the case with Full Blown Fades, there is still time to turn the season around, but the wins need to start piling up. Last season EVP started out 1-5 and was able to pull out a 7-6 record. Could that be the case again this year? You better fuckin’ believe it.

2015 Season Preview

Finally, after what felt like the longest offseason ever, we are back with another football season. If only the Badgers hadn’t gotten pooped on last week. Eeeeesh. Joel Stave is a walking dumpster fire. The absolute worst. McEvoy >> Stave, and it’s not even close. Poor McEvoy being stuck playing wide receiver for a quarterback that can’t figure out the position. Remember last year when Stave had “the yips”? THE YIPS!? A Division 1 quarterback. Ugh. I don’t wanna hear how well he’s played 3 weeks from now either. The dude will have played against Miami of Ohio, Troy, and Hawaii. Who?! Exactly.

Anyways, it feels good to be back writing for World Supreme Championship Fantasy Football. For those new to the league, we will be previewing each team, and recapping after each week. We’ll start with the teams in the Western Division.

THUGS-R-US

What better team to start with than last year’s champion Thugs-R-Us. I think it’s safe to say that Mike Hietpas and his squad are a dynasty, winning titles two out of three years. This league has only been around for three seasons and Mike has won two of them. After Monday night’s draft, it appears as though Thugs-R-Us are on their way to contending for title #3. As Mark Jackson would say, “Momma, there goes that man”.

Yahoo graded Thugs-R-Us at the head of the class with an A+ and it’s hard to argue against that. Bringing back Gronk and Odell Beckham Jr for a 3rd and 9th round pick, while adding Matt Forte, Keenan Allen, and managing to find Arian Foster in the 6th round. If that wasn’t enough, Mike managed to draft a pissed off Tom Brady in the 10th round. Jesus Christ.

This is pretty much Mike’s league to lose.

FAVRE DOLLA FOOTLONG

Mr. Vosters got his first tast of the playoffs last year as he had the strongest start of the 2014 season. The combination of Matt Stafford, DeMarco Murray, and Jordy Nelson led Favre Dolla Footlong to a 6-1 record to start the year. With the emergence of Mike Evans, Andy should have entered the playoffs with the #1 seed. However, mismanagement had Favre Dolla Footlong losing the last 5 out of 6 games. Favre Dolla Footlong did find a way to make it to the championship game. Pretty good, huh? Not when you consider that Favre Dolla Footlong started the 2014 with Jeremy Hill and Kelvin Bemjamin. Only to trade them away for Benny Cunningham and Vincent Jackson. Yikes.

Yahoo graded Andy at the middle of the class with a solid B. Not bad, but probably not good enough to get into Madison. Favre Dolla Footlong wisely brought back Mike Evans, and was able to add AJ Green, DeMarco Murray, and Peyton Manning. A very good core, but Andy’s bench is the fantasy football equivalent to one-ply toilet paper. Part of that bench is Colin Kaepernick who’s career is pretty much over. With Jim Harbough taking his khakis to Michigan, Kaepernick is fucked. Luckily, I’ve compiled a list of alternate careers for this clown.

A stand in/stunt double for Gonzo

A stand in/stunt double for Squidward

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The Cleveland Indians logo

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So I guess he has a couple solid prospects for when he’s out of the league. His days as a quarterback are numbered though.

PUDDLEMERE UNITED

If you haven’t noticed by now the Western Division took the entire podium last year. That brings us to Robyn and the 3rd place Puddlemere United. Robyn enters the 2015 looking to build on the strongest finish in franchise history. After compiling a 9-4 record last year, Robyn was actually considering using a keeper slot on Eli Manning. Eli “47 Turnovers the Last 2 Seasons” Manning. Luckily, she changed her mind to Dez Bryant.

If any team is going to compete with Thugs-R-Us for the Western Division title, it’s going to be Puddlemere United. Robyn has shown an ability to field a competitive team throughout the season. Navigating through injuries and bye weeks like an absolute pro. Also, bonus points for actually having a team logo.

THE 11TH (PUTZY SCHMUCKS)

The 11th comes in to 2015 as a franchise with limited success. After losing in the 1st round of the 2013 playoffs, Andrew responded by coming in 9th in 2014. Andrew notoriously started the year last year by drafting a handful of players that were no longer in the league. (Sidney Rice, Jermicheal Finley).

Things seem to be looking up for The 11th as they are bringing back Calvin Johnson and Le’veon Bell. However, a lethal combination of league suspensions and injuries will make the 1st month of the season a major challenge for Andrew as he tries to keep pace with the Western juggernauts listed above.

I would have bet money on Andrew selecting Ameer Abdullah out of Nebaska with his 1st available pick. Since he used his 1st and 2nd round picks on Johnson and Bell, his first available pick would have been in the 3rd round. However, with his 3rd round selection, Andrew picked Big Ben Roethlisberger. Not a terrible pick, but Abdullah is your guy!!

ROOKIE MISTAKE

In the inaugural season of this league, Sam was a regular season superstar. Absolutely unstoppable. Rookie Mistake won the first 10 of 11 games before losing to Mike in the 1st round of the playoffs. Who else? Rookie Mistake responded by sitting out the 2013 season. After a one year hiatus, Sam fought her way to a 7-6 record. Record-wise, that would have been enough to get into the playoffs, however the total point count is the first tie-breaker, and Rookie Mistake had a handful of weeks where they failed to reach 80 points.

2015 is the year Rookie Mistake needs to prove that the run of 2012 was no fluke. Unfortunately, Sam lives in Minnesota, which puts her in the Western Division. In order for Rookie Mistake to reach the post season, Sam will need to rank within the top three of the Division. Competing with the likes of Thugs-R-Us, Puddlemere United, and Favre Dolla Footlong.

LINCOLN LLAMAS

The Lincoln Llamas have made a living at the very bottom of the standings since league inception. The Lincoln Llamas have amassed a record of 14-26 over the last three years. 2013 being their strongest season at 6-7. In spite of having Peyton Manning and Marshawn Lynch in back to back seasons, Becky was never able to put together a winning roster.

In spite of team history, I’m calling it. Becky and the Lincoln Llamas will reach the post season in 2015. I don’t know how, or who she’ll beat out, but the Lincoln Llamas will be there when the dust settles. Lock it up.

2014 Year in Review

I’ve been getting questions about the league recap, so I’ll go ahead and release what I have at this point. The remaining 5 teams won’t take as long. I promise.

SCOOOOOOOOOB

Scooooob started the year with a bang when he acquired top tier WR Brandon Marshall with only having to give up Michael Floyd, TY Hilton, and suspended RB Ray Rice. Ray Rice would end up never playing a down in 2014 and Floyd and Hilton were just roster filler the previous year. The trade for Nicky G was a no-brainer. On paper it was a terrific trade, however when the season was over, TY Hilton had outscored Brandon Marshall by 58.40 points. To be fair, Marshall did have his season cut short due to injury, but even before then he wasn’t playing up to Hilton’s level. Part of that is on Jay Cutler.

Nicky G raced out to a 2-2 record to start the season and went on to lose every single remaining game on the schedule. Nicky G straight up stopped managing his team around week 7, the poorest of sports.

Nicky G is unsure on whether or not he will return to the league next year. #sourgrapes

LINCOLN LLAMAS

One thing I don’t think I’ll ever understand is how the Lincoln Llamas didn’t win more games over the past two season. Peyton Manning and Marshawn Lynch are arguably the best two players as far as fantasy points. Looking into Becky’s 2014 draft, every player that wasn’t a 2013 keeper failed to move the needle at all. Yahoo gave the Lincoln Llamas a B for a draft grade but, in my opinion, the other 15 draft picks were bye week fillers.

The Lincoln Llamas did manage to jump out to a 2-1 record including a week 3 statement win over Thugs-R-Us. I probably made a big deal out of it at the time too. However, in classic Lincoln Llamas fashion, Becky finished the year going 3-7. To recap the franchise record since joining WSC Fantasy Football, the Lincoln Llamas finished at 3-11 in 2012, 6-7 in 2013, and 5-8 in 2014. Becky has made her living at the bottom of the leagues standings since league inception, and prospects for 2015 are already bleak.

The Lincoln Llamas are essentially the Cleveland Browns of WSC Fantasy Football. They get off to a nice start, but then hopelessly, tragically, fail to live up to expectations. For instance, in 2014 the Cleveland Browns were at one points sitting with a record of 6-3. Brian Hoyer had media members questioning where Johnny Manziel would be traded because clearly Cleveland didn’t need him. ESPN did a feature during their pregame about how this was the year the Browns took the next step, etc. They had this dickface apologize for being wrong:

http://espn.go.com/blog/cleveland-browns/post/_/id/9517/revised-prediction-cleveland-browns

HE WAS ONE GAME OFF!!! Poor guy. If I were him, I would have written a follow up article pounding my chest about how I pretty much nailed it. Maybe he did, who cares? Speaking of Cleveland, remember when they “stole” a first round pick from Indianapolis in the Trent Richardson trade? Well, in a roundabout way, they used that draft pick on Johnny Football. Yikes. By the way, I think if you are over 21, you can go ahead and stop calling yourself “Johnny”. Or Billy, or Kenny, whatever your name is, just take the “Y” or “IE” off of your name. You’re a grown ass man. Willy is, and always will be, okay though.

Here’s to hoping that Becky makes a Vosters-type leap next year.

ROOKIE MISTAKE

Sam made her triumphant return to WSC Fantasy Football in 2014. Starting the year in similar fashion to her dominant 2012 campaign, Sam raced out to a 3-1 record. However, internet issues, and a lack of understanding of the Yahoo Fantasy interface made things difficult, and Rookie Mistake was only able to muster a 7-6 record.  As far as wins and losses go, Rookie Mistake had enough to reach the playoffs, unfortunately Rookie Mistake had a few games where they struggled to reach 70 points. That lack of points held Sam back from reaching the playoffs.

Rookie Mistake was one of two teams to use the Auto pick method of drafting, and Sam’s results were good, not great. Players like Alfred Morris and Victor Cruz can bring you consistent numbers, while Jimmy Graham is arguably the best player at his position. The downfall of Sam’s roster was lack of depth and total lack of quarterback. RGIII and Jay Cutler are good picks if you want to stash a guy and see how it plays out, but you need to have a consistent QB in the meantime.  Rookie Mistake not only refused to grab some insurance at the QB position, but they refused to grab a legit starting quarterback after both RGIII and Cutler backfired. I know Tom Brady was on the waiver wire fooorrrreeeevver. Come on, Sam.

PUTZY SCHMUCKS

It’s tough to be hard on Andrew because he has no pro football in his home state. I’m sure the NFL plays in Nebraska but how much pro football knowledge can you expect a guy to have? For instance, I don’t know shit about the NHL. The NHL isn’t in my state, it’s hard to care when I’m not exposed to it. Badger Hockey is kind of a big deal, but meh. Andrew is a big fan of Cornhusker football, but college football fans aren’t necessarily fans of the NFL. Why does this matter? Why am I making excuses for the Putzy Schmucks you ask? I’ll tell you why, because a person with regular exposure to the NFL would know that players like Sidney Rice, Jermichael Finley, and Nate Burleson are no longer in the league thus not drafting them. Andrew went ahead a drafted all 3 of them. The Putzy Schmucks poor draft resulted in a 1-4 start and essentially ended their 2nd season before it really got started.

Props to Andrew for eventually figuring it out though as he was able to get the Putzy Schmucks to finish the season strong with a 5-3 record. Unfortunately, that’s really all the praise I can give. Yeah, the Putzy Schmucks stuck it out with Tom Brady who eventually returned to elite form. However, Andrew declined a trade to unload Ben Roethlisberger for a 7th round pick when EVP was in desperation mode to reach the post season. Why have 2 elite QB’s when you’re year is finished?

GREEN’N’YELLO

If you were to ask Cathy how a championship team a year ago could fall on such hard times she wouldn’t hesitate to tell you that Eric was supposed to manage her team. True, she did have some assistance in her championship campaign of 2013, the training wheels were taken off in 2014 and we all saw what happened. Eeesh.  It’s worth noting that Green’N’Yello had the hardest schedule in the league in 2014. The easiest you ask? That would be one Josh Gritzuk and Beats By Ray.

Draft night brought a mixed bag for Green’N’Yello. Cathy was able to corral Packers Aaron Rodgers, Randal Cobb, and Eddie Lacy. The rest of Green’N’Yello’s selections were boom or bust players, most of whom busted in 2014 save for Steve Smith who was more of an afterthought with a 14th round pick.

All was not lost in 2014 for Green’N’Yello. After a strong showing in the 2014 consolation bracket, Cathy secured the 2nd overall pick in the 2015 draft. With only the Woodville Peckers in front of them, Green’N’Yello is in prime position to bring back Aaron Rodgers for a 3rd consecutive season. If Cathy were to draft Rodgers with her 1st round pick, she would then be eligible to use Rodgers as a keeper for the 2016 season. That’s kind of a big deal. Perhaps that was Cathy’s plan all along.

WOODVILLE PECKERS

 This was supposed to be the Woodville Pecker’s year. Maybe not a championship year, but a post season run to put the Schmidt Schmidt franchise in the conversation for perennial contenders. The draft went well for the Peckers. Schmidt was able to come away with the best fantasy quarterback and wide receiver and on paper he had the league’s top running back in LeSean McCoy. Unfortunately. McCoy was unable to hold his value as he finished the season ranked #12.

LeSean McCoy isn’t the sole reason for the Pecker’s short comings in 2014. The 2014 Peckers failed to reach expectations due to a severe lack of depth. Once you get past the top 3 players in Luck, Brown, and McCoy, it’s a wasteland of “..who?” and “…really”? Yeah, Julian Edelman is a good player, but he’s not moving the needle at all. Same goes for Sammy Watkins the rookie. Watkins has the potential to be a stud in this league, but he needs to have a stud QB throwing him the ball. Not Kyle Orton.

By the way, Kyle Orton, I’m pretty sure, is a long lost Siedl brother.

siedls

 

One thing I never really understood about Kyle Orton was why the sleeves on his jersey were sooooo long? Is that not cumbersome when trying to throw the ball? Look at how easy it looks for Matt Ryan to throw a pass in his jersey below.

matty

Now look at Orton

kyle orten

What an absolute animal.

With Antonio Brown and Andrew Luck poised to return to Woodville in 2015, once again the outlook for Schmidt Schmidt is bright. No pressure, dude.

 Alright. On to the playoff teams. You’ll notice that the next six teams get a little more attention and that’s because they deserve it. You know, ‘cuz they were good enough to make the playoffs.

 

DUNDAS BLUES

Draft night 2014. EVP is forced to use his phone for the draft as Cathy was using his laptop. No big deal, he prepared and tested this plan a handful of times beforehand with no hiccups or red flags to make EVP reconsider. The 1st round goes well as the Dundas Blues take Julio Jones. Thugs-R-Us designated Adrian Peterson as a keeper, and Green’N’Yello did the same with Aaron Rodgers to finish out round 1. EVP was in prime position to pick anybody left on the board as he knew Cathy would take either Jordy Nelson or Randal Cobb. Dundas Blues had planned to either take whichever Green Bay WR OR LeVeon Bell of Pittsburgh. Either way, his 2nd round pick is going to be a good, can’t-miss pick. Oh, but the Samsung Galaxy locked up. It froze. The Dundas Blues had only 90 seconds to reboot the phone, sign back in, and make their pick. Well obviously that didn’t happen. The Dundas Blues reverted to auto-pick with no pre draft rankings. EVP was at the mercy of the clowns at Yahoo.com that are responsible to the default player rankings. So with the 2nd pick of the 2nd round, EVP brought home Andre Ellington. Not the end of the world. EVP was able to sign back into his draft and finish the remaining 15 rounds and grab studs like Emmanuel Sanders and first half stud Phillip Rivers.

The Dundas Blues would follow their above average draft by going 1-1 to start the season. A deflating loss to Beats By Ray, and a very underwhelming win over the Woodville Peckers. It was at this point the 3rd year veteran made perhaps the best trade in league history sending Vincent Jackson and Benny Cunningham for Jeremy Hill and Kelvin Benjamin. By year’s end the players sent to the Dundas Blues would outscore their counterparts by 140.70 points. Sorry, Vosters.

After that trade, the Dundas Blues responded by going 0-4. Jesus Christ!!!

At the end of week 6 the Dundas Blues were a franchise worst 1-5. One win. Five losses. The playoffs were out of the question and EVP was faced with options of tanking the rest of the season in hopes of being able to land the 1st overall pick, or going on the greatest run in league history and streak his way into the playoffs. EVP went with option #2 and was able to finish the season going 6-1 with an incredible 6 game win streak. The Dundas Blues were able to achieve a 7-6 record, good enough to snag the 5th spot in the 2014 post season, one spot ahead Favre Dolla Footlong. EVP is one of few teams to have achieved a post season birth every year in league history.

This surge to the playoffs was both a blessing, and an awful, horrible curse. Had EVP only been good enough to reach the 6th seed, he would have had a 1st round matchup against ThankYouLordBreesus, and he would have thumped Abby by 26 points. Instead the Dundas Blues faced off against post season krytponite Thugs-R-Us who secured a heartbreaking 3 point victory. Emphasis on heart breaking. That loss is half the reason this recap took so damn long. After having put together the run I had just to get into the playoffs to have it all end like that….c’mon man.

WEEK 13 RECAP

BEATS BY RAY

BESTPIX Seattle Seahawks v St. Louis Rams

All season long, I wrote about how Beats By Ray was playing way above their head and would eventually come back down to earth. That just never happened. With an unorthodox strategy, Josh has been able to build himself a championship contender, and perhaps the favorite to take home the 2014 WSC Fantasy Football title.

A few weeks ago, Josh made an eyebrow raising trade sending a 1st round pick to Scoooob in exchange for AJ Green and Tre Mason. What appeared to be a mere “throw in” in Tre Mason has blossomed into a game changer with keeper potential for next season. Last week, Mason exploded for 34.40 fantasy points in part of Beats By Ray’s 25 point beat down of Green’N’Yello. Mason joins the prolific group of TY Hilton, Denard Robinson, AJ Geen, and Justin Forsett in one of the league’s scarier starting lineups.

At the end of the regular season, Beats By Ray would only lose three times on their way to a 10-3 record. Tops in the league, good for a 1st round bye in the playoffs. Josh has earned himself a worry free week 14

PUDDLEMERE UNITED

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Puddlemere United was one of three teams to have clinched their place in the playoffs back in week 13. This is the 1st taste of post season for Robyn’s franchise, but it appears as though Puddlemere United is just getting started in terms of being a perennial playoff and championship contending team. The lone question mark for Puddlemere United is that in the last 3 weeks, Robyn has been unable to eclipse the 100 point mark. Averaging just 76.55 in that stretch, Puddlemere United will need to field a better lineup if they wish to advance in the playoffs. Fortunately, Robyn has 2 weeks to figure out her optimal lineup.

Before this fall’s draft, Robyn elected to bring back Wes Welker and Montee Ball as Puddlemere United’s keepers from 2013. At the time is seemed like a good idea, but soon after the keeper deadline, Wes Welker sustained a concussion, followed by a league suspension for “poppin’ a molly”.

At the end of the regular season, Robyn’s keepers would be good for a grand total of 68.8 points. Woof. Compared to Puddlemere United’s alternatives for keepers, the Ball/Welker combination looks like a horrible decision in hindsight.

WELKER/BALL                    DESEAN JACKSON            DELANIE WALKER            ANDREW LUCK

5TH + 8TH Round pick               7TH Round pick                 9TH round pick               9TH Round pick

68.8 fantasy points                     124.00 points                   91.30 points                  308.74 points

Yeah, the Andrew Luck comparison made me gag a little when I first read it, too. Especially when you compare his stats to Robyn’s current QB, Tony Romo, who has a grand total of…wait for it….188.32 points. Eeeeeeesh.

In spite of those early season moves, Robyn has been able to will Puddlemere United to a 9-4 record. She has earned herself a bye this week and will be able to relax while Mike sweats it out in week 14.

THANKYOULORDBREESUS

breesus7

After starting the year an abysmal 1-3, Abby has gone on to win 7 of her last 9 games  on her way to accumulating the league’s highest point total. Speaking of scoring points, the 3 playoff teams from the East Division have higher point totals than that of the teams in the Western Division. They’re also seeded higher too. Remember all that chatter about the East being soft? Me either.

ThankYouLordBreesus goes into their 1st round playoff matchup against in-house rival Favre Dolla Footlong, who mercilessly thrashed Abby by 35 points in their last meeting in week 4. In that matchup, Abby was without Demaryius Thomas who was on a bye week, meanwhile Favre Dolla Footlong had both Jordy Nelson and Demarco Murray run wild for 22 and 27 points, respectively. The matchup looks to favor ThankYouLordBreesus this time around as both Nelson and Murray haven’t seen north of 20 points in the past 3 weeks. 5 weeks for Murray. Meanwhile, Drew Brees has flipped the switch for Abby, scoring 29 and 30 points in the last two weeks. To sum up, Abby is trending upward and Andy is suckin’ wang.

ThankYouLordBreesus faces off against Favre Dolla Footlong in round one of the 2014 fantasy football playoffs in week 14.

THUGS-R-US

New York Giants

All the anticipation for Josh Gordon’s return and the WR has turned in performances of 12 and 7.5 points. Hardly worth all of the noise that his return had made, but not horrible considering he hasn’t played in a game since last season. For a team that needs some help at WR, it is a bit perplexing that Mike would give up on Donte Moncrief so quickly. Granted, at this point, he’s not an every week start, but Thugs-R-Us is known for long, roster crippling stashes. Thugs-R-Us picked up Moncrief on October 25th, only to trade him to Woodville on November 6th. Trades in this league take 2 days to process, so the Moncrief trade was actually agreed upon on November 4th.  So a guy that Thugs-R-Us management was high on lasted only 10 days. A player who scored 26.60 points last week might be worth another look, dude. Moncrief was ultimately cut by the Woodville Peckers 5 days later and has sat in the free agent pool ever since.

I don’t want to say that Mike draws a favorable matchup in the 1st round of the playoffs, because on paper he’s an 11 point dog in his week 14 matchup against the Dundas Blues. However, Mike has simply owned EVP in the playoffs. In the 2012 playoffs, Mike outlasted EVP 136-125. In 2013 Mike was somehow able to outscore EVP 149-139. I can’t believe I scored 139 points in a loss. What the fuckin’ fuck? Ugh.

Thugs-R-Us will look to continue his post-season streak over the Dundas Blues in week 14.

DUNDAS BLUES

Denver Broncos vs the Seattle Seahawks

The winning streak finally came to an end. When it was all said and done, EVP snapped off 6 wins in a row, streaking into the league’s 5th seed. It was damn close to being 7 in a row, if not for both Andre Ellington and Jimmy Graham forgetting show up last week. Had either one of those players scored even half of their projections, the Dundas Blues would have earned the victory. Even with the loss, EVP owns the league’s hottest team. The Dundas Blues are averaging 123.75 points since week 8.

While battling through the dreaded “running back by committee” in Cincinnati, and banged up Andre Ellington, EVP has been able to get production from the RB slot in CJ Anderson. Thinking about it, it appears as though the Dundas Blues have adopted/stolen the strategy of Puddlemere United in having the Denver Broncos starting RB and slot/possession WR(Emmanuel Sanders). The Dundas Blues go into the post season with nothing to lose. A team that started 1-5, just reaching the post season is a success.

EVP will try to exercise his post season demons against Mike and Thugs-R-Us

FAVRE DOLLA FOOTLONG

jordy-nelson1

Oooooooh, Vosters. After starting the season at 6-1, Favre Dolla Footlong has shit all over themselves, tallying a 1-5 record to finish the season. Uh oh. After finally giving props to where I thought they belonged, Vosters fell from first to worst. Had Rookie Mistake been able to score more points this season, Favre Dolla Footlong would have fallen out of the playoffs altogether.  In the Dundas Blues recap above, you’ll see that the Dundas Blues have been averaging a league best 123.75 over the last six weeks. Favre Dolla Footlong? A whopping 96.92 points. Andy is going to need more than that if he has any hope of a championship or even advancing.

Favre Dolla Footlong is a bit of a mystery because it’s not as if they have been suddenly devastated by injuries or anything. Andy still has all of the players that helped him achieve his hot start. Perhaps an even more talented roster if you count Mike Evans. Although Matt Stafford has been wildly inconsistent, and ownership has made no effort in upgrading at the QB position.

All in all, the fans and ownership of Favre Dolla Footlong should be celebrating as Vosters has clinched a spot in the post season for the first time in franchise history. Vosters is going to need to flip the switch and put up some competitive numbers if he wishes to keep the his season alive.

Favre Dolla Footlong matches up against wife and in-house rival ThankYouLordBreesus in week 14. The winner going on to the 2nd round.

WEEK 11 RECAP

PRESSURE IN PUDDLEMERE: ALL EYES ON ROBYN AS SHE INCHES CLOSER TO THE PLAYOFFS

Philadelphia Eagles v New York Giants

After two years of winning just six games, Puddlemere United has won a franchise high eight games, on the brink of a 2014 playoff berth. Going in to week 11, Robyn was poised to collect her 9th victory and officially be the first team in 2014 to clinch a spot in the post season.

Matching up against the struggling team of Rookie Mistake, Puddlemere United was a lock, right? By now we should all know that nothing in fantasy football is a lock, especially when Eli Manning is your starting quarterback. Without the services of Tony Romo and Dez Bryant Robyn had a challenge in week 11, but nobody would have guessed she would struggle to score 55 points. 54.70 points is not something we expect to see out of the league’s best team, regardless of bye week or injuries.

Week 11’s loss could prove to be costly as Puddlemere United matches up against Favre Dolla Footlong in week 12. Favre Dolla Footlong, a team that had held the league’s top spot for 9 straight weeks will be looking to make a statement against Puddlemere United after having lost 2 weeks in a row. A week 12 loss to Favre Dolla Footlong would knock Puddlemere United out of 1st place in the Western Division =, potentially costing Robyn a 1st round bye.

Puddlemere United with battle Favre Dolla Footlong in week 12 for control of the Western Division

BEATS AND STREAKS: JOSH TAKES CONTROL OF EASTERN DIVISION

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After losing two out of three weeks, Josh has put together 2 wins and a row. Taking a commanding 2 game lead in the Eastern Division with just two weeks left to play. Along with Puddlemere United, Josh has assumed a spot in the playoffs along with putting the top spot in the Eastern Division, for the most part, out of reach. For Beats By Ray to fall out of the Eastern Division’s top seed, Josh would have to lose the remaining 2 games, and either ThankYouLordBreesus or the Dundas Blues would have to win out and outscore Beats By Ray.

Last week Josh made a trade to bring in AJ Green and Tre Mason in exchange for a 1st round pick, Andre Williams and Andrew Hawkins. This trade proved to be the difference as Josh was able to upset ThankYourLordBreesus in week 11. A Surprising move for a guy who proclaimed Andrew Hawkins to be a “top 5 WR”.

Without a 1st round pick next year, Beats By Ray’s 2014 season is championship or bust.

Beats By Ray looks to clinch a 1st round bye and eliminate Schmidt Schmidt from playoff contention in week 12 against the Woodville Peckers.

FAVRE DOLLA FALLING: VOSTERS DROPS 2 IN A ROW 

matt stafford

After I give the guy props, he goes ahead and loses two in a row, three out of four games. After losing to the Dundas Blues in rivalry week, Favre Dolla Footlong shit all over themselves in week 12, scoring just 62.02 points. A baffling move by Vosters was to bench Mike Evans a week after scoring 18.50 points in week 10. For those who don’t pay close attention to Tampa Bay Buccaneers football, Mike Evans went off for 32.90 points in week 11. Mrs. Vosters explained that the she “okayed” a move to put DeSean Jackson in the starting lineup over Evans, but the fact that the idea was even conceived falls squarely on the shoulders of team owner, Andy Vosters.

For 9 weeks, Favre Dolla Footlong stood over the rest of the league, daring it to challenge for the top spot. Perhaps Vosters and Favre Dolla Footlong have gotten more than they bargained for as they have fallen from 1st, down to 3rd place. With teams like Thugs-R-Us and ThankYouLordBreesus in position to knock them down even further, week 12 is a must-win for Favre Dolla Footlong.

Favre Dolla Footlong marches into a battle against Puddlemere United in week 12. Winner gets control of the Western Divisions top spot.

WELCOME BACK, GORDON: THUGS-R-US WELCOMES BACK PROLIFIC WR

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After 11 weeks, Thugs-R-Us finally gets to activate Josh Gordon, who was suspended for a large chunk of the season after getting caught smoking marijuana for the 2nd time.  Mike has grown a reputation for stashing players for an excruciating amount of time, often with little to no payoff. For example, last season Mike held on to Percy Harvin for the entirety of the 2013 season, only for Harvin to contribute a grand total of 1.70 points. SEVENTEEN YARDS. Roddy White also received some significant time stashed away on Mike’s bench last season with limited success. Let’s hope that Josh Gordon pays off the 11 week stash with a big performance against Atlanta.

Even without Josh Gordon, Thugs-R-Us has been able to put together an impressive string of games, winning four of their last five games. Their only loss in that span, a bye week casualty to Beats By Ray. With a week 12 victory over the lowly Lincoln Llamas, Thugs-R-Us could very well overtake Favre Dolla Footlong for the league’s 3rd spot. An impressive feat for a team that lost their 1st round pick prior to week 2.

Thugs-R-Us will look to keep on rollin’ like Daunte Culpepper in week 12 versus the Lincoln Llamas who are coming in with a 2 week win streak.

BREESUS TAKE THE WHEEL: ABBY DROPS 2ND GAME IN A ROW

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After putting together an impressive 5 game winning streak, ThankYouLordBreesus has fallen off, losing two weeks in a row. As is the case with Green’N’Yello, Abby is somewhat reliant on the New Orleans Saints to play well for Drew Brees and Mark Ingram to produce for her fantasy team. Unfortunately, the Saints, and the whole NFL South, have been awful. A team that is supposed to be unbeatable at home has lost their last two home games and coincidentally, so has ThankYouLordBreesus.

ThankYouLordBreesus has had high projections the past two weeks, but their running backs have been unable to come through on said projections. Specifically Matt Forte and Mark Ingram. Mark Ingram was destined to come back down to earth, as Alabama running backs have had a knack for busting in the NFL. Our beloved Eddie Lacy being the lonely, lonely exception.

It is not all doom and gloom for ThankYouLordBreesus. With a record of 6-5, Abby sits well within the playoff race. 5th overall, 2nd in the Eastern Division. Winning one of their remaining games will put them in good position to reach the post season.

Week 12 will be Abby’s biggest hurdle yet. ThankYouLordBreesus matches up against Green’N’Yello, a team hell bent on spoiling the season of the remaining teams on their schedule.

GOIN’ STREAKING: EVP MAKES IT 5 IN A ROW

Denver Broncos vs the Seattle Seahawks

At the conclusion of week 6, the Dundas Blues hung their head with a record of 1-5, in sole possession of last place in the league. At this point, EVP would have been wise to sell off his assets that he didn’t wish to keep and build for next season. Aka the Scooooob strategy. Instead, EVP dug in and put together a winning streak including victories over Beats By Ray, Favre Dolla Footlong, and the Woodville Peckers.

Barring an unforeseen injury, the Dundas Blues will most likely add a 6th victory to their winning streak against the league’s worth team of Scoooob who recently sold off any real asset that could keep them competitive in 2014.

The Dundas Blues need to win out to get into the post season as their points total will not be high enough to trump the other 6 teams in the mix for the playoffs. All signs point to a showdown between the Dundas Blues and ThankYouLordBreesus in week 13.

EVP looks to continue winning in week 13 against Scoooooooooob.

NOT WITHOUT A FIGHT: SAM BATTLES TO 6-5

jay-cutler

A bit of a schedule anomaly, Sam has been able to put together 2 wins in a row. One over a Scooob team that gave up weeks ago. Another over Puddlemere United that was brutally handcuffed by the bye week. Either way 6-5 is still impressive, given that Sam has only made one roster move, if you discount the waiver moves that the commissioner had to do for her.

Making her return to fantasy football after a successful 2012 campaign, Sam’s 2014 season has been a struggle. A lack of internet, and issues with the yahoo interface have proven to be Sam’s biggest challenge this year, yet she still finds herself very much alive in the playoff race. A proven winner who knows what it takes to win games, Sam has a relatively easy battle in week 12 against a Putzy Schmucks team that is absolutely crippled by the Pittsburg Steelers’ bye week.

Much like the Dundas Blues, Rookie Mistake needs to win out and achieve a record of 8-5 as their point total will not be high enough to win any tiebreakers. Rookie Mistake could very well be responsible for knocking Favre Dolla Footlong out of the playoffs in week 13.

Sam will look to make it 3 in a row against the struggling Putzy Schmucks in week 12.

WORRIMENT IN WOODVILLE: PLAYOFF HOPES TAKE SERIOUS HIT IN WEEK 11

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Before the season started, Schmidt Schmidt made the joke that he would add the letter “O” to his team name for every victory. Fortunately, Schmidt Schmidt decided against such a thing as the Woodville Peckers would only have 1 “O” left. To make matters worse, the owner of the Peckers owes the owner of the Dundas Blues another submarine sandwich from Cousin’s Subs. Ham and provolone, of course.

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What I didn’t realize is in head to head matchups, the Woodville Peckers all time record versus the Dundas Blues is 0-3. That’s 21 inches of sub sandwich.

It is not quite panic time for Schmidt Schmidt as his Woodville Peckers seem to be the only team that has the points total to get into the playoffs with a record of 7-6. A victory over Beats By Ray would do the job, as the Woodville Peckers have Scoooob in week 13, an all but guaranteed victory. Roger Goodell had Schmidt Schmidt’s back as he made sure Adrian Peterson did not play another down in 2014. Had Josh been able to start Peterson, the Peckers would have been on the wrong side of a nightmare matchup.

As I said before, a victory over Josh in week 12, and Schmidt Schmidt is in fantastic shape for his first playoff berth in the history of the Woodville Peckers.

REST OF THE LEAGUE:

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  • Puzty Schmucks are officially eliminated after a week 11 loss
  • Lincoln Llamas waited too long to put a winning streak together
  • Cathy is going to be a major spoiler for the rest of the league with the red hot Packers offense
  • Scooooob is the 12th ranked team in the league and will never hear the end of it

 

WEEK 10 RECAP

Week 11 is upon us and it seems as though this week’s match ups trump that of week 10’s “rivalry week”. The Buffalo Bills face off against the Miami Dolphins tonight. For those with Dolphins or Bills on their team, think twice about placing them in your starting lineup. The Thursday night games have been a crap shoot. Anybody without NFL Network who wishes to watch the game, feel free to come over to Glendale.

PUDDLEMERE UNITED

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Going into week 10 in a battle of first place teams, Robyn and Puddlemere United were projected to get their shit tossed by almost 30 points. The combination of Tony Romo and Dez Bryant had other plans as those two alone combined for 49 points. Just about half of Puddlemere United’s week 10 total. Without Romo and Bryant, Puddlemere United had only one other player score in double digits in Julius Thomas at 18.30 points.

With a week 10 win, and a Favre Dolla Footlong loss, Robyn moves into sole possession of 1st place and has more than likely clinched herself a playoff berth. The first taste of the playoffs in franchise history.

Puddlemere United has some tough sledding in week 11 as both Tony Romo and Dez Bryant have a poorly timed bye week. Robyn is again forced to rely on the services of Eli Manning. Couple that with the lack of productivity from Wes Welker, and the Russian roulette that has become the Bronco’s running back situation and Puddlemere United is real danger of losing hold of 1st place.

Puddlemere United looks to stay in first place with a victory against Rookie Mistake

BEATS BY RAY

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To begin the year, Beats By Ray jumped out to a 6-1 record, but had major doubts from the rest of the league regarding Josh’s long term sustainability. After losing 2 of the last 3 weeks, and falling to the 4th spot, it appeared those doubts were realized. However, after a convincing victory over Thugs-R-Us, Josh and his team of Beats By Ray are back in 2nd place(1st in the Eastern Division) with a record of 7-3.

With a difficult week 11 matchup against ThankYouLordBreesus, Josh is without the services of two of his biggest contributors Justin Forsett and Denard Robinson, both on the bye week. In a bit of a panic move, Josh traded for the AJ Green, and Terrance West, giving up a 1st round pick. Duuuuuuuuude.

Beats By Ray will attempt to hang on to 1st place in the Eastern Division in a matchup against ThankYouLordBreesus.

FAVRE DOLLA FOOTLONG

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Through all of Sunday, Vosters enjoyed a commanding lead over EVP and the Dundas Blues as the heart of Favre Dolla Footlong’s lineup kicked off at noon. Capping it off was Jordy Nelson’s 27 point performance to assure that Vosters leave week 10 in first place. No way Mark Sanchez and Kelvin Benjamin could combine for 40+ points…right? In a blowout loss to the Eagles, Kelvin Benjamin caught a pair of garbage time touchdowns, leaving Vosters with a week 10 loss as Favre Dolla Footlong falls all the way down to 3rd place. Uh oh.

The week 10 loss was the worst case scenario for Favre Dolla Footlong as they go into a week 11 matchup against Thugs-R-Us without fantasy football’s best running back, Demarco Murray. In fact, right now, Vosters has only one active running back on his roster in St Louis backup Benny Cunningham. A week 11 loss drop Vosters to 5th place, going into a matchup against the league’s #1 team Puddlemere United. It would be in Favre Dolla Footlong’s best interest to win this week and assure themselves a playoff spot.

Favre Dolla Footlong looks to get their 8th victory against Thugs-R-Us in week 11.

THANKYOULORDBREESUS

Drew Brees

Brett Favre, during his retirement ceremony, said “All good things must come to an end.” Like Abby’s winning streak, which was snapped at 5. After a 1-3 start, ThankYouLordBreesus was able to put together 5 wins in a row. 5 weeks in a row. Going more than a month without losing a game is incredible. The last time Abby put together a streak like this was in 2012 when she LOST 6 WEEKS IN A ROW. Yuck.

With the sudden emergence of Mark Ingram and return of Jeremy Maclin being added to an already prolific roster featuring Drew Brees, Demaryius Thomas and Matt Forte, Abby’s team is going to be tough to beat for the rest of the season. With the best divisional record, and 2nd most points in the Eastern Division ThankYouLordBreesus looks poised to make the post season for the 2nd year in a row.

ThankYouLordBreesus looks to rebound from last week’s upset in week 11 against Division leading Beats By Ray.

THUGS-R-US

1. Arizona Cardinals (8-1)

Mike and Thugs-R-Us have had to scratch and claw their way to a 6-4 record. I thought perhaps Mike led the league in all time transactions, but that honor still belongs to EVP at 176. 176 transactions is absurd. If Robyn were to finish her year with her current 14 transactions it would take her 12 and a half seasons to accumulate the number of transactions the Dundas Blues have had in 2 and a half seasons. Good god. Thugs-R-Us are a distant 2nd with 115.

Since the beginning of the 2014 fantasy football season, Mike has had the week 10 rivalry week circled on his calendar. Speaking of roster moves specifically made to bolster his week 10 lineup. (Roddy White) Without the services of Rob Gronkowski and Keenan Allen, Mike needed some help from 2nd and 3rd tier players. Things started out well for Thugs-R-Us as Jared Cook contributed 14.40 points. Jamaal Charles added his usual 15+ points. Now it was Carson Palmer’s time to shine. On the heels of a new 3 year, 50 MILLION DOLLAR extention, Carson Palmer was going to put on a show for his home town fans in Phoenix. Instead, Carson Palmer reinjured the same ACL that he injured in the playoffs for Cincinnati, leaving Mike about 23 points shy of victory in week 10. Sorry dude,

Thugs-R-Us look to rebound from an ugly week 10 against Vosters and Favre Dolla Footlong.

WOODVILLE PECKERS

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Of all of the current playoff teams, Schmidt Schmidt appeared to have the most favorable matchup in week 10. The high flying Woodville Peckers against the lowly Putzy Schmucks had all the ingredients of a blowout, and it was. Except the Peckers were the team on the wrong side of a 33 point laugher at the hands of Andrew. The Woodville Peckers were plagued by having 7 players fail to score in double digits, including Antonio Brown and LeSean McCoy who are supposed to be cornerstones of the Schmidt Schmidt franchise.

Much like Vosters, a week 10 loss is a worst case scenario. A week 10 victory against one of the league’s worst team would afford the Woodville Peckers the ability to lose on of the remaining games and still be able to get into the post season. Instead, Schmidt Schmidt must secure a victories against in city rival Dundas Blues, and division leading Beats By Ray. Not an easy task considering the Dundas Blues have put together the longest active winning streak at 4. The return of Andrew Luck will go a long way.

Schmidt Schmidt looks to start his post season run in week 11 against the Dundas Blues.

DUNDAS BLUES

Denver Broncos vs the Seattle Seahawks

The Dundas Blues came out of the gate as slow as possible with a 1-5 record. Every game since week 7 has been a must win, and that is exactly what EVP has done. Taking down the league’s number 1 team in Favre Dolla Footlong was the 1st of many hurdles between the Dundas Blues and the post season. At minimum, EVP needs to win 2 more games. Realistically, because of EVP’s low point total, he’s going to have to win out and finish 8-5.

The 4 week winning streak is the league’s longest active streak. The Dundas Blues essentially need to extend that streak to 7 if they wish to get into the playoffs. A mid-season trade for Jimmy Graham has bolstered EVP’s lineup into a possible contender.

The Dundas Blues look to extend their winning streak to 5 and win another ham and provolone against the Woodville Peckers in week 11.

ROOKIE MISTAKE

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I don’t know how Rookie Mistake is 5-5 right now. Sam has scored 104 fewer points than the league’s worst team of Scoooooob, yet Rookie Mistake is 5-5 with a divisional record of 3-3. Coming off of a week 10 victory over Scoooob who started 3 Cincinnati Bengals on Thursday and pretty much lost his matchup already on the first game of the week. Poor kid.

Rookie Mistake is very much still alive in the playoff race, but much like the Dundas Blues, they’re going to need to win the remainder of their games. That starts this week against Puddlemere United, the league’s 1st place team. Not an impossible feat, but Sam has her work cut out for her.

Rookie Mistake will go into week 11 with their season on the line against Puddlemere United.

PUTZY SCHMUCKS

matt ryan

Unlike Rookie Mistake, the Putzy Schmucks have scored a plethora of points, but haven’t been able to turn said points into wins. Andrew has scored more points than the Eastern Division’s 1st ranked team Beats By Ray. Looking at the Putzy Schmucks schedule and he has lost a heart breaking 4 games by less than 10 points. 2 of those games by less than 2 points. If two of those games go the other way, the Putzy Schmucks are 6-4.

Unfortunately, the Putzy Schmucks find themselves at 4-6. Coming off of an impressive beat down of the Woodville Peckers, but needing a miracle to reach the post season. The Putzy Schmucks need to win out, along with a boat load of help by the rest of the leagues. Props to Andrew for not giving up on the season. As the commissioner that means a lot to me.

The Putzy Schmucks matchup against in week 11 against in house rival Lincoln Llamas.

LINCOLN LLAMAS AND GREEN’N’YELLO

rodgers

These two teams epitomize how unfair fantasy football can be. On one hand you have the Lincoln Llamas who refuse to help themselves in the form of trades or waiver wire moves, despite having a favorable waiver priority all season. On the hand you have Green’N’Yello who do everything they can to put a competitive team on the field, and for the most part, have done just that. In fact, since week 4, Cathy has averaged 107.70 points per game, yet has a 1-6 record in that time.

These two teams find themselves at the bottom of the league, ranked 10th and 11th, despite a night a day difference in effort. Sorry, Kitty Cath.

SCOOOOOOOB

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Scoooob is laughably at the bottom of the WSC Fantasy Football standings. During the two years I lived with Nicky G I watched him win fantasy football league after fantasy football league. The dude is a pro. Unfortunately, Scooooob has been just god awful this year. I will give props to Nicky G for knowing it was a lost year and selling off some of his assets in preparation for next season.

Better luck next season, dude.

WEEK 9 RECAP

FAVRE DOLLA FOOTLONG

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Andy Vosters is 7-2 in fantasy football this year. I have spent 10 weeks trying to poke holes in the case he has made for the league’s best team but I finally have to give credit to him. Through 9 weeks, Favre Dolla Footlong is 7-2, and in those two losses have lost by a combined 12 points. TWELVE POINTS. One of the more impressive parts about Andy’s success is the fact that he has only made 4 roster moves since the draft in August. Meanwhile, Beats By Ray and Thugs-R-Us have made a combined 56 roster moves. One of those moves was a trade with the Dundas Blues exchanging Kelvin Benjamin and Jeremy Hill for Vincent Jackson and Benny Cunningham. Woof.

Mr. Vosters owes his pal EVP who strongly suggested keeping Demarco Murray prior this year’s draft. Murray has been the best fantasy running back in the league this year. With Tony Romo having two fractures in his back, the Dallas offense will look to rely on Murray even more. This is bad news for the rest of the league, especially those in the Western Division with eyes on the #1 seed.

Favre Dolla Footlong matches up against the upstart Dundas Blues in week 10.

THANKYOULORDBREESUS

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Holy shitballs, Abby. Winning 5 weeks in a row is incredible. What a ride. Speaking of rides, the last time I was in Wisconsin Dells we went to Mount Olympus. After we were done with the water park we went on the Zeus roller coaster. Instead of joining us, Abby read a book. SHE READ A BOOK instead of riding a goddamn roller coaster. Poor Andy was left comforting a heavy set black lady who was convinced it was her time. He did an incredible job too.

Word came in that Abby was able to get Mark Ingram into her starting lineup at the absolute last second last week. A move worth 23 points.

ThankYouLordBreesus has perhaps the best WR tandem in the league in Demaryius Thomas and Jeremy Maclin. Maclin, coming off last year’s ACL injury had his draft stock fall and Abby was able to snatch him in the 5th round.

ThankYouLordBreesus matches up against Puddlemere United in week 10.

PUDDLEMERE UNITED

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Robyn needed to come out of week 9 with a victory to keep pace with Favre Dolla Footlong in hopes of overtaking the #1 seed and a first round bye. Puddlemere United was without Tony Romo, who reinjured his surgically repaired back. Relying on Eli Manning is a punishment I wouldn’t wish on anybody. Fortunately, Manning came through, beating his week 9 projection by 6 points. This is the 2nd time in 3 weeks that Puddlemere United has gone into the Monday Night Football game with her fantasy matchup on the line.

During this year’s draft, Robyn took a huge gamble on Arian Foster in the 2nd round. Foster, who’s 2013 season was plagued with injury to the point where the Woodville Peckers told him to fuck off and cut him loose. Foster has repaid Robyn with 161.10 points, good for 2nd among running backs, only 9 points behind the almighty Demarco Murray. Unfortunately, Wes Welker appears to have lost any fantasy relevancy as Emmanuel Sanders appears to have taken over the role of possession WR.

Robyn faces off against Mrs. Vosters and the Eastern Division leading ThankYouLordBreesus.

THUGS-R-US

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As only Mike could do, he has taken a team of (mostly) scrubs and scratched and clawed his way to 6-3, good for 4th in the league, 3rd in the Western Division. Winning 3 weeks in a row, tying for the 2nd longest winning streak with the Dundas Blues. A week 9 victory over Scooooob has to feel good as a victory over Scoooob always feels good regardless of when it happens or how truly awful Scooob has been. We’ve covered how good Jamaal Charles has been. We’ve covered the return of Rob Gronkowski. The unsung hero of Thugs-R-Us to this point has been Miami running back Lamar Miller. Lamar Miller has gone from a low-end flex play to a top 10 fantasy running back AHEAD of Jamaal Charles in fantasy points.

Sitting at 6-3 Thugs-R-Us are in great shape to reach the post season for the 3rd season in a row. If Mike wishes to go anywhere in the playoffs, he would be wise to look into upgrading at the QB position. Leaving his team in the hands of Colin Kaepernick, who has the lowest football IQ in the league, or Carson Palmer who’s been good not great. Come playoff time, Thugs-R-Us are going to be matching up against guys like Tony Romo, Drew Brees, and Andrew Luck.

Thugs-R-Us faces off against Beats By Ray in a battle of 6-3 teams in week 10.

BEATS BY RAY

cam newton

Josh almost pulled another victory out of his ass in week 9. At one point the combination of TY Hilton and Andre Williams had put Beats By Ray ahead of Puddlemere United as the Indianapolis Colts blew out the New York Giants on Monday Night Football. Unfortunately for Josh, garbage time was generous to Eli Manning who was able to get the job done for Robyn. With the week 9 loss, Beats By Ray dropped from 2nd place to 5th place. That’s a long ways to fall when teams are making their push for the playoffs. A week 10 victory is imperative if Beats By Ray wishes to keep pace with ThankYouLordBreesus and the Woodville Peckers.

Perhaps Josh’s best move of the season was picking up Adrian Peterson who could very well be the starting running back for the Minnesota Vikings in week 11. Not a week too soon either as Frank Gore’s production has really leveled off.

Josh is doing quite well for himself considering the awful awful team that Yahoo’s autopick drafted for him. For those who don’t remember, let me remind you.

1st Round: Brandon Marshall : – 66.40 fantasy points

2nd Round: Toby Gerhart – 32.70 fantasy points

3rd Round:  Keenan Allen – 53.40 fantasy points

4th Round:  Bishop Sankey – 42.60 fantasy points

The first 4 rounds of Beats By Ray’s draft accounted for 195.10 total fantasy points so far. As a comparison, the first 4 draft picks of the Woodville Peckers have accounted for 528.50 fantasy points. Props to Josh for getting himself out of that mess.

Beats By Ray has a big game against Thugs-R-Us in week 10.

WOODVILLE PECKERS

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The Woodville Peckers have put together a nice run in the last 4 weeks winning 3 out of 4 games. The one loss in that stretch was a 115-135 loss to ThankYouLordBreesus. The schedule up to this point has been a little hard on Schmidt Schmidt as his opponents have scored a combined 900.38 points. Compared to the league’s #1 ranked team, Favre Dolla Footlong, who’s opponents have scored a mere 803.20 points.

Perhaps the best news Schmidt Schmidt has received this season was Nick Foles going down with a broken collarbone. Maybe that injury is what LeSean McCoy needs to get back on track and produce like the #1 running back he was projected to be.

The Woodville Peckers go into week 10 against the Putzy Schmucks. Schmidt Schmidt has chosen to feature Theo Riddick, Clay Harbor, and Jordan Matthews in lieu of making a trade. Travis Kelce would look pretty good in that lineup. Just sayin’.

DUNDAS BLUES

Denver Broncos vs the Seattle Seahawks

On a weekly basis, the Dundas Blues are projected to score the most points in the league. Rarely has it happened. In fact, it has never happened. However, EVP has managed to get his shit together with a 3-week winning streak. Still, the Dundas Blues are averaging a little bitch 95.44 points this season, even after a 130 point performance in week 8.

EVP is doing everything he can to keep the pressure on the Eastern Division’s top teams. A week 10 victory would bring the Dundas Blues to .500. The Dundas Blues battle the league’s top team in Favre Dolla Footlong in week 10.

ROOKIE MISTAKE

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To start the 2014 Fantasy Football season it appeared as though Sam had made her triumphant return to our league without skipping a beat from her dominant 2012 season. After jumping out to a 3-1 bus, Rookie Mistake has lost 4 off their last 5 games averaging 76 points during that stretch.

The contrast between the outlook of the Dundas Blues and Rookie Mistake is black and white. Both teams are 4-5 but nobody is expecting Sam to challenge for a playoff spot in the Western Division, meanwhile in the East, EVP is keeping team owners up at night.

With their season on the line, Rookie Mistake matches up against Scooooob

PUTZY SCHMUCKS

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The Putzy Schmucks have spent most of their season at the bottom of the league’s standings. Last season we friendlily made fun of Andrew for having a vast collection of Baltimore Ravens on his team. Maybe I wasn’t paying attention last year, but now I am certain that the owner of the Putzy Schmucks is a big fan of the AFC North. As of Thursday afternoon, the Putzy Schmucks own 8 players on AFC North teams. My goodness.

Of the 3 teams below .500 in the Western Division, the Putzy Schmucks are realistically the only team with a chance of getting in. A savvy veteran, Andrew was able get into the playoffs last year as a 5 seed. Taking care of the Woodville Peckers in week 10 would be step one in the Putzy Schmucks playoff run. Losing would assure a losing record, ending any hopes of the post season.

GREEN’N’YELLO

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Poor Kitty Cath. She put up a respectable fight against Vosters and the league’s best team, but being without the services of Aaron Rodgers, Eddie Lacy, and Randall Cobb, we knew it would be an uphill battle for Green’N’Yello. The post season will not happen for the league’s defending champion, assuring WSC Fantasy Football will not have a repeat champion.

Cathy and her team of Green’N’Yello has had the toughest schedule in the league as opponents have scored 1029.62. Meanwhile teams like Favre Dolla Footlong and Beats By Ray have opponent totals around 800. Terrell Owens says it best below.

Cathy will look to play spoiler the rest of the season, matching up in week 10 against the Lincoln Llamas

LINCOLN LLAMAS

Peyton Manning

Looking at Becky’s roster, her record in understandable. After the draft, I wrote about how Peyton Manning and Marshawn Lynch were a terrific foundation to build a team around. The Lincoln Llama’s received a B for a draft grade from Yahoo, but the heart of that grade came from her keepers. Michael Crabtree, Chris Johnson, and Marques Colston are flex plays at best, and Jason Witten has been a bit over rated since the inception of this league in 2012.

When I look at the teams at the bottom of the league, I feel like they think they can only improve via the waiver wire because they think other teams are going to laugh at potential trade offers. Maybe they don’t check their team outside of Sunday and it doesn’t matter.

Becky plays Green’N’Yello in week 10.

SCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOB

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Oh, Nicky G. There are 4 or 5 team owners that check their team on a daily basis. I know Nicky G is one of them. Scooooooob’s 2014 season has been a disaster. Nicky G had a nice bidding war on Tuesday for the services of AJ Green in an effort to build for next year. At one point, he had offers of Josh Gordon, Justin Forsett + 1st round pick, Alshon Jeffery +4th round pick. All three offers were taken off the table Tuesday night when Nicky G waited too long to pull the trigger. Poor Scoooob.

Nicky G is the worst team in the league, bottoming out at the 12th spot. He matches up against Rookie Mistake in week 10.